7 Life Lessons That ALWAYS Hold TrueAdeshola Ezeokoli
These seven life lessons hold true, no matter where you are, what you do, and what your life goals are. They will lead to balance and success in every aspect of your life
- I learned to be true to myself. What exactly does that mean? First of all, in order to be true to yourself, you have to know yourself. Who are you? A lot of times, we define ourselves so much by what we do, that we forget to define ourselves by we are. Ask most people, who are you, and the first thing they say is what they do as a profession. Your profession is not who you are, it is what you do. Which brings us back to the question who are you? You need to study yourself, and know who you are as a person. It is only when you know who you are as a person that you can be true to yourself. You cannot be true to a “self” that you do not know. How do you get to know yourself? Well, study yourself for who you are, and not who you want to be. Personality tests such as the Myers Briggs and Fascinate are good pointers that help reveal your personality. However, do not stop there. In the light of what you get from those tests, study yourself as an individual. Take a step back and examine how you react to situations in life. Observe how you interact with various people. Notice the effects that certain people have on you. Study the types of environments that you thrive in. If you have children, study them. Our children tend to pick up our character traits (including those that we try to hide),and you can learn a lot about yourself by watching your kids. As you discover who you are as a person (this is not a one day affair, by the way), be more of that person that you discover. Lean into your strengths, and lean away from your weaknesses, as you become more true to yourself. Be “more you”. I use this example a lot about how in my early 20s I wanted to be one of those soft spoken ladies, diplomatic, sweet, and not so talkative. I felt that that was the way to be. I would try it, and I would last for all of three minutes. If you have ever met me, you will know that when I laugh, the people in Australia can hear. My voice is strident, and I talk a lot more than the average person. In fact, I only know three people that talk more than I do. When I meet people that talk more than I do, I actually notice. That is me. I have learned over the years to become more me, and be true to myself. This has led to more success in my life, as I have capitalized on my personal strengths, and who I am in order to get better at what I do.If you keep hiding who you are, because you feel that you are not good enough, you will never blossom or ever be able to find balance in your life. Be true to yourself
- I learned to treat myself with dignity. Please treat yourself well. Treat your body like it is the most precious thing on earth. Treat your mind as though it is the wellspring of all knowledge. Treat your spirit as though God himself dwells within you. Too many times, we take care of everything, and everyone, and leave ourselves last. A lot of times, we want to exercise, eat right, and have good rest and sleep; but we do not prioritize this. We feed our minds all the junk that comes on TV, or social media without discrimination. We neglect our spiritual state by not engaging in spiritual practices such as prayer, meditation, Bible reading, learning from Spiritual teachers, fellowship, etc. Treat yourself with dignity. View yourself with the same care and reverence, that you would view your favorite celebrity. When you see yourself as important, worthy, lovable, and beautiful you will treat yourself with dignity. When you treat yourself with dignity, there are certain places you will not go, and certain practices you will not engage in; and certain people you will not hang around. There is a balance. This is not to tell you to become a haughty person. In fact, a haughty person is not treating themselves or the people around them with dignity. They are just being egocentric. Treat yourself with dignity, all the dignity that you deserve.
- I am not in competition with anybody. I have learned to radically embrace a life without competition. I am living my life, and not fighting anyone for anything. There is room at the top for everyone, just as the sky is big enough for billions of stars. Learn to collaborate with people, rather than compete with them. There is no quicker way to lose your balance in life, as well as your peace of mind, than to think that you have to keep up with other people, real or imagined. Just live your life. Do what you have to do, when you have to do it. Everyone has a different path in life. If you compare yourself to people, and compete with them, at what point in time do you get to enjoy your own life? Remember this, you are in competition with no one.
- The world will stop to let pass, those who know where they are are going. If you are on a mission, whether it is a mission to lose 10 pounds of weight; or a mission to feed 10,000 hungry children; Or a mission to own a thriving business- The principle is the same. Get about your business with passion, perseverance, and patience. Keep moving. Keep going. Keep growing. Keep thriving. You cannot know everything, about everything, but work with what you know, and more resources, information, and people, will come your way. Become single minded about your pursuits. Even the Bible says, a double minded man is unstable and will receive nothing from God. By all means, take out time to know for certain what you need to be doing per time. Once you find it, stay focused.
- I will always be grateful. I have found gratitude to be very powerful. I cannot say enough about the power of gratitude. Gratitude is the antidote to grumpiness, and one of the keys to balance and success in life. Gratitude literally rewires your brain and primes you for positive thinking. The more grateful you are for what you have, the more you attract circumstances to be grateful for. When you focus on what you have rather than what you lack, you actually realize that life is not as bad as you may have previously thought it to be. I have made up my mind to be grateful all the time. Even in the down seasons of life, if you look hard enough, you will find things to be grateful for. When you get used to being a person who lives with gratitude, you will automatically look for the silver lining in every cloud. Make up your mind, going forward that you will start and end each day with three things that you are grateful for. In three months, your outlook on life would have radically changed. Always be grateful.
- I will always keep learning. I have committed myself to being a lifelong learner, as well as gaining mastery of the disciplines that I have dedicated myself to. I am constantly amazed, when I meet people who do not read books. How is that even possible? What do you do with your eyes if you do not read? Commit yourself to being a lifelong learner. Read books, attend conferences, take a class, hire a coach, talk to people who are ahead of you. Learning does not stop outside the walls of college. it is only when you learn more than you already know, that you can grow and change. Whatever your next level is, you will need knowledge to get there. Always be learning.
- I will always be helping. Even if you cannot help everyone, you can help someone. You can help someone get to the next level. You can help someone with knowledge, time, money, empathy, prayers, connections, a job, support, holding space, words of encouragement. There is no end to what people need, and you can be a source of help even if you think that you do not have much. The truth is that so many people need help, and sometimes it can be overwhelming. However, I would rather help one or two people that I am able to, as opposed to turning my back on 100 people because I cannot help them all. I truly want to be able to look back on my life and see all the people that I have helped in one way or another. As you help people, you attract the help you that you need yourself. As the Bible says, Jesus went about doing good…. We are supposed to “go about doing good“. Doing good is not limited to one space or another. It is meant to be a lifestyle for us. Always be helping.
What life lesson have you learned that hold true all the time? Please leave a comment below.
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