Do You Think Like This?

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Do You Think Like This?

Welcome back to Balance with Dr Shola! 
As a life coach, I constantly meet people with mindsets that do not serve them! Their very thoughts hamper their life progress.

I heard this preached as a sermon by a great woman of God Pastor Mayowa Ijisesan. She has a very practical, balanced, easy-to-relate-to approach to the gospel and life. This is the “Shola paraphrase” of what she said-

What type of thinker are you?
Your thoughts govern your life and what you allow your mind to dwell continually is what you will eventually produce as a fruit of your life. The following types of thinkers do not necessarily think that way all the time, and I’m sure some of us can relate to being in one or even all of these modes at given points in our lives.

1. Emotional thinkers: These are people who think the way they feel. For instance, if they wake up and feel a little sad, it is a sad day. If they feel bad they think bad thoughts continually. Thoughts and emotions are usually intertwined to the point where they almost become inseparable. These people have bought into the lie: “I feel, therefore I am”. It becomes a vicious cycle as bad feelings lead to bad thoughts, which lead to bad feelings, which lead to bad thoughts, etc,etc,etc. Emotional thinkers believe their emotions and are very much in touch with their feelings. They also tend to make decisions based on how they feel. The key to breaking out is to realize that you have more control over your emotions than you think you do. You can arrest bad thoughts as soon as they rear their ugly head and not allow them to overwhelm you.

2. Wishful thinkers: These are dreamers, and always building castles in the air. They live in a fantasy world always wishing for someone else’s life. They spend most of their time in theirs heads, and do not necessarily get about pursuing he dreams that they have. Wishful thinkers are impractical. They tend to pursue lifestyles that they cannot afford, borrowing their way brought life. They read more into relationships than what is really there( because of what they wish is there). Even though they wish for great things, the wishes do not translate into effort to make these great things come to pass. Breaking out of wishful thinking may require you to submit yourself to a friend who will force you to make reality checks from time to time. “Can you really afford this Ferrai?” “Do you really think this club boy you are dating is going to become a Pastor one day?” “Are you sure you want to give up your job and start a hedge fund? You know nothing about finance.” You see my point. When you get into those wishful thoughts learn to separate what is real from what is fake.


3. Pessimistic thinkers: These are the Debbie Downers. Full of negativity, dread and fear, pessimistic thinkers find it hard to see the good in anything.”It won’t work” seems to be their mantra, and they can give yo a thousand and one reasons why a thing would be too hard to do, too hard to find; too little, too much; not feasible, too complex, too simple…. You name it, and they will find a reason to shoot it down. They have a negative mindset, most of which is rooted in fear and dread of the unknown, as well as something I like to call “Comfortzone-itis”.Pessimistic thinkers tend to worry a lot too.To stop being a pessimistic thinker you need to get to the root of the pessimism. Fear has to be dealt with. Take baby steps by stepping out of your comfort zone in little things. Hang out with people who are taking bold steps and succeeding. Take ownership of your thought. If God told us not to worry that means we must have the ability not to worry.

4. Regretful thinkers: These thinkers are stuck in their past mistakes. They are unwilling captives of their own thoughts.With a victim mentality, the cannot get past the past. Living a life of regret is like driving and constantly looking through the rear view mirror. Let it go! Did you lose all your money when the stock market crashed? Did you run out on your wife and children? Did you miss opportunities due to your fault or no fault of your own? Were you abused? The past HAS to be buried. “But it is not easy”. Not it is not. Life is not easy. Is it better to pick up the pieces of your life and find help to make a new start or wallow in regret and never amount to anything? Make amends and restitution( if you can) but do not allow your past to define you. From here on out, it is up to you

5. Healthy Thinkers: Healthy thinkers are realistic, optimistic and pragmatic. They know the power of thoughts and do not let their thoughts go to places they do not want them to go. Healthy thinkers do not allow their emotions do not constantly govern their thoughts. Healthy thinkers have godly perspectives on life and know that they have control over their thoughts. They are not ruled by fear and dread. They do not succumb to wishful thinking to the point that they lose their grip on reality. Do you have a healthy thinking perspective? Healthy thinkers do not read undue meanings into mundane things.

To be a healthy thinker:
1. Realize that your thoughts are in your control
2. Know that your thoughts are not your emotions and learn to separate the two.
3. When your thoughts wander where you do not want them to go, drag them back with your thoughts, words and images.
4. Renew your mind with the Word of God.
5. Break unhealthy thought patterns
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Warm regards
Dr Shola Ezeokoli
“Transformation through balance”
“A balanced life is a beautiful life”

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