To give your dreams, goals and expectations any chance of coming to pass, you must avoid the next dream killer:
Closely related to the point above (naysayers, being a type of wrong association), wrong associations are everything that is associated with where you do not want to be. To get to your goals and dreams; to achieve the change that you need in your life, you have to change your people, places, thoughts and things.
Apart from naysayers, you need to avoid people who have no intention of leaving one place and going to the next level. For example, if you want to lose weight, you need to have some health conscious friends to motivate you. If your dream is to quit smoking, you need to leave behind, your friends who have no desire to quit. You need to find some non smokers or ex-smokers to motivate you. If you want to start a business, the people you share your hopes and aspirations with, have to be people who can see where you are going, and not people who will tell you: “Why do you want a business? Is your paycheck not good enough?” I realize that you cannot just fire all your friends, acquaintances and associates. You do however need to be purposeful in relationships and matters related to your dream. Change some of your people, associate with people who add value to you.
Do you say that you want to lose ten pounds and keep going to Burger King for meals? Do you claim to want to stop drinking alcohol and continue to hang out in bars? Do you state that you want to save $2000 and yet, visit casinos at every opportunity? Do you want to marry a church-goer and hang out in clubs?
Change your places.
At a point in my life, a few years ago, I had six credit cards (we all make bad choices sometimes)! I was in debt and going into more debt, as I spent and struggled to make payments. Sometimes I forgot about one card or the other, adding up those interest rates. When I got serious about getting my finances in order, I had to come up with a system, to pay them off and then, get rid of them.
Drug paraphernalia. Ash trays. Junk food. Porn videos. Credit cards. Whatever is associated with the level that you want to leave behind, has to go. There is a saying that goes thus: If you want to dine with the devil, use a long spoon. I say, throw the long spoon away and do not dine with the devil at all. Those things hold you back from where you need to be and serve as a crutch for whenever you think of weakening and turning back.
Your thoughts have to change. You have to develop a positive mindset. Go to the Bible and meditate on scriptures that talk about who you are in Christ. Look up the promises of God who said that he will never leave you, nor forsake you. Read books on positive thinking. A negative mindset will keep you where you are, and prevent you from reaching where you want to be. A positive mindset, despite your circumstances, will give you a better outlook, and serve to propel you to where you need to be. Statements like: I never have any luck; Even if I look at a cake, I gain weight; I have no willpower, etc, should never be part of your vocabulary. Change you thinking, change your story.
Say NO to wrong associations.
What surrounds us, is what is within us- T.F. Hodge