LIFE IN BALANCE-The Father Every Wife WantsAdeshola Ezeokoli
Fathers are very important. They are the bedrock of society. Without fathers there would be no children, and without children there would be no families and no societal growth. Fathers are however maligned in popular media, and a lot of times portrayed in a bad light. Some fathers have not lived up to societal expectations. Some fathers have indeed abandoned their families in the name of career, extramarital affairs and other things. There are however a great many fathers who are doing their best, raising their children, being good role models, husbands, leaders and balanced men who follow God and lead their children in the same.
I am starting a three part series, talking about the kind of father every wife wants . This is about the ideal father every woman wants for her children. Read on and be blessed.
1. Spiritual head: This is a father that would guide his family into spiritual things. A man of the Word and the Spirit. In most homes, it is the woman who takes the family to church, leads family prayers and the like. As the head of the home, however, the husband and father is supposed to be the head in spiritual things, not material and physical things. Take responsibility, as a Christian man not to leave the spiritual atmosphere of your home to chance. Pray with your family, pray for your family, teach your children the Word of God. Not only will they learn from you, the will also have an example, a model. Now, as a spiritual head your model is Jesus Christ and the church. You are not to force or coerce you family to go to church, or pray. If your wife is not of the same religion, you have to show the beauty of your faith by prayer and patience, not by bullying.
2. Gentle leader: The operative word is leader, not tyrant or dictator. The other operative word ( 🙂 ) is gentle.You are to be decisive but not stubborn; you should not be wishy-washy, either . What goes on in your home should not pass you by, unnoticed. It is true that husband and wife have different responsibilities in the home, but no woman wants her husband to have an I-don’t-care attitude, leaving things to chance. On the flip side, no woman wants a husband/father-of-the home to be a tyrannical boss, throwing his weight around; putting his foot down; yelling at everyone; snorting like a rodeo bull; not listening to reason. Some people have taken, “Wives submit to your husbands” and run with it in the WRONG direction. That verse was written to wives and NOT to husbands. You cannot “receive the Word” for your wife and it is NOT your duty to “make her submit”. Besides, submission is not taken, it is given and you cannot make someone submit to you. Be a leader , not a bully.
3.Loving father: See my previous posts on loving your children. Every wife wants her husband to have a good relationship with her children. Love your children, you will not have any other chance with these ones that the Lord has given you. Do not pass up the opportunity to build a loving relationship with your children. Tell them you love them, show it in your actions, be there for them. Find out what they like and buy it/do it/show it, etc. Include them in the things that you do, as much as it is possible. For instance if you work in IT, show them how to use computers/write programs etc. If you are a doctor, tell them about medicine. If you are a preacher, you might take them with you to your meetings. These are just examples. Your bonding time with your child will depend on your child’s age, interests, and feasibility. Your children must know, in no uncertain terms that you love them unconditionally.
Watch this space for part two of The Father Every Wife Wants.